Mutation is the New Punk
by Courier999
Summary: Jubilation Lee is a teenage mutant girl from LA who accepts an offer to attend a boarding school in New York. There, she gets caught up in a series of tangled webs- the mutants' rights movement on the one hand and the "who's in, who's out" dynamics of the student body. Rated T for language, violence, and sexual themes. Set in the same universe as "Musical Illusionists." R&R!
1. Chapter 1

X-MEN: Mutation is the New Punk

 _X-Men_ and related characters are property of Marvel. This is part of the Earth-H universe.

Chapter 1: You Tell Me That It's Evolution

LOS ANGELES:

"Nicole, where did we go wrong?" a man griped.

"Eddie, I've told you that it's something beyond our control. So what if our little Jubilation's a mutant?"

"It's not that. It's her music, or the volume thereof."

As if to demonstrate Eddie's point, the opening notes of "Universal Appeal" blasted from a nearby room.

"It's just a phase she's going through, Eddie. Acceptance of her new identity or something like that."

"Can you tell her to accept her new identity quietly? My head's killing me."

"I'll do it."

* * *

"Jubilation Lee, open this door."

Jubilation sighed as she turned off the music.

"What is it, Mom?"

"Jubilee, your music's too loud."

Jubilee pouted as she opened the door.

"You know what they say- if it's too loud, you're too old."

"That may be the case, dear, but your father and I own this house. So if you don't want to spend the night in a youth hostel-"

"But it's the Misfits!"

Nicole sighed as she surveyed her daughter's bedroom.

"Just keep the volume down. The neighbors might complain if you don't."

"I'll just take it outside."

"You keep playing that music that loud- you'll go deaf."

"Well, then I'll get cyberears."

"We don't make THAT much money, Jubilation. Besides, your insurance won't cover it."

Jubilee cracked a smile at her mother's retort.

"I'll be back in soon."

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

You may be wondering where I got the title from. Well, I was thinking up the idea of what a mutant subculture would look like when I picked up on the anti-authoratarian streaks running throughout the various incarnations of the _X-Men_. And what subculture best embodies anti-authoritarianism than punk rock? So yeah, the mutant subculture of Earth-H is going to be heavily influenced by punk rock. Also now is a good time to announce that "Misfits Assemble" is no longer part of Earth-H canon. It's set in its own continuity now (Earth-HMU), meaning that the Earth-H version of Aja Leith is not a speedster.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: An Offer You Can't Refuse

"Jubilee, your mother and I have been thinking recently." Edward Lee announced that night at dinner.

"It's my mutation, isn't it?"

"It is."

"I thought you were okay w-"

"Your mom and I are okay with you being a mutant, but a lot of people won't be. Also, think about your powers."

"I just shoot fireworks from my fingertips, Dad."

"Those could still do some real damage."

"So I don't shoot them at lawns or people. Easy solution."

Jubilee's mother cleared her throat.

"Jubilation, I don't think that's the point."

Jubilee rolled her eyes as if to say 'Get on with it.'

"I was going through the mail earlier today, and…well, I found a couple of things worth mentioning."

Jubilee and her father both raised an eyebrow.

"The first thing was one of those tracts from that Church of the Natural Law."

"And the other?"

"Some kind of application for a private boarding school up in New York. The Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters or something like that."

"Let me guess- you're sending me off there."

"Only if you want to go. From what I've heard, a lot of the student body consists of mutants like you." Nicole replied.

Jubilee closed her eyes and thought it over.

"Well, you don't get these kinds of offers everyday. I'll go."

* * *

TWO WEEKS LATER:

"Remember to call us regularly."

"Yes, Mom. I'll call."

"Take care of yourself."

"I will, Dad."

"Keep your grades up and stay out of trouble."

"I'll do my best, Mom!"

The car stopped, and Jubilee stepped out.

"I love you guys." she said.

"We love you too, Jubilee." her mother replied.

As her parents drove off, Jubilee slung her duffle bag over her shoulder and proceeded towards the airport terminal.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTES:

If you're wondering what the Church of the Natural Law is, they're sort of like the Church of Humanity from the comics. They're like certain fundamentalist churches in the US, but these guys are fixated on hating all the weird stuff floating around Earth-H: magic users, Transformers, mutants, mutates (i.e, Spider-Man), Inhumanoid cults, artificial intelligences, gargoyles, cybernetic/biological augmentations, superheroes, aliens, and so on.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: On The Road To Xavier's

"Well, here I am. New York, New York." Jubilee muttered to herself as she stepped out of the JFK terminal.

 _And GOD am I tired!_ she thought.

As she stood on the curb, the young mutant instinctively raised her hand into the air.

" _YO, TAXI!_ "

In response to Jubilee's summons, a yellow cab pulled over.

"Grand Central." she mouthed as she entered the vehicle.

The cabbie nodded, and Jubilee nodded off in the backseat.

* * *

HALF AN HOUR LATER:

"Kiddo, we're here." the cabbie announced.

Jubilee woke up from her brief nap and handed over the fee.

"So, where you headed?"

"The Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters."

"Oh, you're headed out to Sleepy Hollow? Word of advice- stay clear of that town around Halloween. If I were that horseman, I'd have booked it for quieter parts with all those tourists showing up."

"Thanks for the tip, mister." Jubilee replied as she exited the cab.

* * *

The sun was rising over the Hudson as the train made its way to the Tarrytown station. Inside one of the cars, Jubilee was listening to her travel playlist, and the Misfits' "Abracadabra" was just finishing.

 _Come on. Come on. Let it b-_

" _There's a man who leads a life of danger! To everyone he meets- he stays a stranger! With every move he makes, another chance he takes! Odds are he won't live to see tomorrow!_ "

Jubilee groaned as she listened to the Misfits' cover of "Secret Agent Man".

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Yes, I know that the school is located in North Salem in the comics. But Sleepy Hollow is a) part of Westchester County and b) more well-known. And yes, there is a real Sleepy Hollow, New York. And if you're wondering how the sun could just be rising as Jubilee's getting near the school, we'll assume she left Los Angeles at night, arrived in New York in the early morning, and factor in the travel time for the train trip.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Welcome To Xavier's

"Your paperwork all checks out, Miss Lee. Welcome to the Charles Francis Xavier School for Gifted Young persons." the secretary intoned.

Jubilee sighed in relief as she was handed a campus map.

"You're in Claremont Hall, room 315. Since you're a late arrival, you'll be sharing it with two other students."

Jubilee nodded as she picked up her room key and left the registrar's office. As she proceeded to her dorm, she took notice of the abundance of Neoclassical, Colonial, and other pre-20th Century architectural styles that dominated the campus's buildings.

 _Well, at least the grounds are pretty_. she thought.

After about ten minutes of walking, she arrived at Claremont Hall. It was a brick Gothic Revival structure of about four or five stories.

 _Home sweet home for the next few years. At least it isn't built like a concrete box._

* * *

"Hello? Anybody home?" Jubilee asked as she knocked on her room's door.

The door swung open to reveal a brunette girl with her hair in a ponytail.

"Hello, stranger. What brings you here?" she asked.

"I'm your new roommate." Jubilee answered.

The door opened fully, and Jubilee stepped in.

"So you're Jubilation Lee. I was…well, expecting someone a bit taller. Like an extra inch or two."

"And you are?"

"Katherine Pryde, but you can call me Kitty. Everyone does."

"Okay then."

"Well, Jubilation-"

"Call me Jubilee. Everyone else does."

Kitty nodded as she cautiously eyed her new roommate.

"Well, Jubilee- do you need any help unpacking?"

"No."

"Are you-"

"I was told I had two roommates. Where's the other one?"

As if in answer to Jubilee's question, a young woman with auburn hair and a skunk stripe walked in. She was clad in a dark green camisole, flannel pants, and a black bathrobe. She was clutching a cup of coffee with a vise=like grip.

"Good morning to you too, Rogue."

"Who's this?" Rogue asked, her voice carrying a Dixie accent.

"Let's get the introductions out of the way. Rogue, this is Jubilee. Jubilee, this is Rogue. Go on, shake hands."

Jubilee nervously extended her hand. Rogue took the cue, clasped it in her own gloved mitt, and gave her new roommate a vigorous handshake.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

If you're wondering what exactly the Earth-H version of the Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters is, it's a privately run Middle College (something of a cross between a high school and a community college) school. Also, not all the students are mutants.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Meet The Class, Part 1

"Um…why is there an indigo-skinned demonic creature sitting beside me?" Jubilee asked at lunch.

"Oh, that's Kurt." Kitty replied.

Jubilee blinked.

"Kurt Wagner, at your service. Pay no attention to my appearance, for I am but a normal German lad."

Before Jubilee could say anything, a young blonde girl walked over.

"Andrea, say hi to the new girl." Kitty demanded.

The blonde waved hello to Jubilee.

"Name's Andrea Marguiles, but everyone calls me Rubbermaid."

"Why?"

Andrea grinned as she extended one of her arms and grabbed another student from across the room.

"And who's your friend here?" Jubilee asked.

"James McFarlane. I'm just a normal human being who came here with Andrea from the circus- can somebody tell this madwoman to let me go?"

Andrea released her cohort from her grip.

"Ask and ye shall receive." she deadpanned.

"So, Andrea- you said you came from a circus?" Jubilee asked.

"Liefeld's Circus. Dad was a human cannonball and Mom was an aerialist. When my mutation kicked in, I got in on the act as a contortionist. Then I got an application to come here-"

" _Basta_!" Kurt ordered.

Andrea nodded and walked off.

"Anybody else we need to-" Jubilee asked.

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed a young woman seated alone. Her hands were adorned with bloodied bandages, and a copy of _The Hunchback of Notre Dame_ was lying on the table beside her.

"Who's she?" Jubilee asked, pointing to the mystery student.

"That's Lyra Carrington. She's from across the pond, and- well, her power's not exactly mealtime conversation." Kitty answered.

"Hey, if I get to meet Kurt and Andrea, you can at least tell me about her."

Rogue put down her fork and sighed.

"You really want to know?"

"Try me."

"She's got a blood disorder called coagulopathy."

"So that's the big secret? A blood disorder?"

"Her mutation lets her manipulate her own blood through open wounds. And since her blood doesn't clot easily and because part of her mutation is that she generates a lot of blood when she gets revved up-"

Jubilee turned white as a sheet.

"You mean-"

"Yep. Even Cronenberg would pass out if he saw her in action." Rogue replied.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Lyra Carrington is not my OC. She is property of Claudia Scarlett Short (a friend of mine) and is being used with her permission.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Meet The Class, Part 2

"Hey, Rogue! Mind giving us a hand here?" a young man asked as he prepared to lift up a load of groceries.

Rogue shrugged and picked up the groceries with ease.

"Try doing it yourself for once, Bobby. Or get Warren or Piotr to do it for a change."

Kitty and Jubilee were standing around watching.

"Who's who?" the latter asked.

"The guy who can't carry his own groceries is Bobby Drake- school's big man on campus and track star _de jour_."

"And the guys Rogue mentioned?"

"Warren Worthington III and Piotr Rasputin. They're nice guys- Bobby is too, once you get to know him."

"Anyone else we should meet on campus? Besides from our teachers or professors, I mean." Jubilee asked.

"There's one guy." Rogue piped up.

"Who?"

"He's tall, lean, and wears a purdy hat. Calls himself Gambit, and he's a regular freeloader."

"What dorm's he in?"

"None. He lives out of the boathouse, or so I've heard." Kitty answered.

Just then, Kitty's phone went off.

"Great- floor meeting's in fifteen minutes."

* * *

Jubilee looked over the assembled students of Claremont Hall's third floor. Standing in the midst of the crowd was a redhead in her late teens or early twenties.

"Ladies of Claremont Three- may I have your attention please?"

The group nodded.

"My name is Jean Grey. I'm your RA, and I would like to say that all of you are extremely lucky to be able to attend this school."

Jubilee rolled her eyes.

"First, let's get the important items out of the way. Claremont Hall and all other buildings on campus are smoke-free. Not that you should be smoking anyways, but if you do, you're doing it outside. Also, if you possess powers of an explosive or inflammatory nature- don't use them in the dorm. Speaking of powers, don't use them to get free food or drink out of the lobby vending machines- especially you, Tabitha!"

A blond girl with a pixie haircut turned to Jean and stuck her tongue out at her.

"Now then, let's get on with basic safety information…"

* * *

FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER:

 _So bored._ Jubilee thought.

"Now that we've got that out of the way, let's get to know each other a bit better. Lyra, you can start." Jean announced.

The auburn-haired girl that Jubilee had seen at lunch cleared her throat.

"Hello, I'm Lyra Carrington. I'm from the UK, and I like making marionettes and similar things." she stammered.

Jubilee watched disinterestedly as Andrea, Rogue, and Kitty stepped forth.

"Hi, I'm Tabitha Smith. I'm from the San Fernando Valley, and I like blowing things up with my powers. Next!" the blond with the pixie haircut piped up.

"Hello, I'm Megan Gwynn. I'm from Abergylid, Wales, and I like long walks in the woods with friends." a pixie-like girl announced.

"Hello, I'm K-"

Jean's eye wandered and focused on Kurt Wagner.

"You're a floor too high, Kurt."

"I misjudged a 'port! Besides, you didn't seem to notice me!"

Just then, a man with brown hair walked up the stairs.

"He's up here, Scott!" Jean announced.

Jubilee looked at the man as he walked into the hallway. He was wearing a pair of sunglasses with dark red lenses.

"Everyone, this is Scott Summers. He's the RA for the floor below us."

By this point, Jubilee was making a run for it.

 _Oh no you don't._ Jean thought.

Before Jubilee could get down the stairs, she found herself being pulled back by some unseen force.

"Anyways, let's have our would-be escapee introduce herself."

"My name's Jubilation Lee, but I would prefer you to call me Jubilee. I'm from Los Angeles, and I'm a fan of the Misfits."

"Which Misfits? You talking about Glenn Danzig?" Rogue asked.

"I don't know who that guy is!"

Jean proceeded to set Jubilee down.

"Well, that was enlightening. I certainly hope we can all get along, remain civil, and be friends with each other." the former announced.

Jubilee blinked as she rose up from the floor.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Case Of The Mondays, Part 1

 _Beep. Beep. Beep._

Rogue rolled over and tried to ignore the blaring alarm clock.

" _It's too early to be early in the morning._ " she grumbled.

In the bunk above her, Kitty was still sound asleep, as if she couldn't hear the alarm going off.

" _Oh what a beautiful morning! Oh what a beautiful day!_ " Jubilee sang.

Rogue's eyes flew open and she shot upwards.

" _SHUT THE HELL UP! SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO SLEEP HERE!_ " she bellowed at the top of her lungs.

"Well, you should know that class is in ninety minutes."

As if on cue, Kitty phased through the top bunk and landed right next to Rogue.

"Get out!"

Kitty meekly nodded and got out of bed. Once she was gone, Rogue turned to Jubilee.

"Now, since you're the first one up, I'll let you in on something."

Jubilee leaned in.

"See this hand? It should have a coffee in it. You have as long as it takes to brew me a pot."

Jubilee nodded and raced towards the coffee maker.

* * *

"So, first class is…English with Miss Ororo Munroe." Jubilee said as she looked her schedule over again.

"Well, looks like we're sharing that class." Rogue muttered in response.

"I'm guessing you're the veteran here. So, what do you think about that teacher?" Jubilee asked.

"Miss Munroe? She's okay. But you're going to need to take a lot of notes in class." came the reply.

"How d-"

"I type. Let's just say my handwriting sucks- something about how my fine motor memory isn't up to snuff."

"Good to know. Now let's get to class ASAP."

 _Well, at least she's got some enthusiasm._ Rogue thought as she slung her backpack over her shoulder.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: Case Of The Mondays, Part 2

"I can see you weren't kidding about taking notes." Jubilee mumbled as she and Rogue left class.

"That's the thing with Ororo-"

"I thought she was 'Miss Munroe'."

"We're on a first-name basis. It's a bit of a long story involving a rich blind woman, a bunch of mutant hooligans, and conflicted loyalties on my part."

"Sure, I- wait, what?"

Rogue smirked at seeing Jubilee's reaction.

"Was that a joke?" the latter asked.

"Kind of."

"It was a good one. Had me going there for a minute. Now let's get a move on, 'kay?"

Jubilee reached out for Rogue's gloved hand. Unfortunately, her aim was slightly off and she touched a bit of exposed wrist.

"I feel kind of funny…" she said in a dazed voice.

And with that, Jubilee collapsed into the grass.

* * *

SEVERAL MINUTES LATER:

"Good, you're awake."

Jubilee blinked as she took in the fluorescent light.

"Where am I?"

"Nurse's office."

Jubilee's eyes wandered before settling on a black-haired woman in her early-to-mid thirties.

"And you are?"

"Anne Ghazikhanian, but you can call me Annie or Nurse Annie."

"What happened to me?" Jubilee asked.

"You touched Rogue." Annie stated matter-of-factly.

"What's that-"

As if on cue, Rogue entered the office.

"Sorry about what happened. It's just- well, I drain people through skin-to-skin contact." she explained.

"Now you tell me."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: The Pitch

LATER THAT WEEK:

"So, why're you getting me up early on a Saturday?" Jubilee griped as she got out of bed.

"The Professor wants to see you." Rogue answered.

"Professor? Who's he?"

Rogue sighed.

"Professor Xavier! The guy who runs this school!"

"What does he want with me?"

"Just get your keister out of bed, and I'll tell you when we get there."

* * *

AN HOUR LATER:

Jubilee took a seat in what she presumed to be a small private library. As she scanned the room, she saw Rogue, Kitty, Kurt, and Jean standing along the walls, along with Mrs. Munroe and a few other figures she didn't particularly recognize. Among those was a man in a leather jacket with a distinctive haircut, another man with a mullet, and an older black man with a flattop. Behind a nearby desk was an older man in a wheelchair, with no trace of hair on his head.

"Good morning, everyone." the man began.

Jubilee raised her hand.

"Yes?"

"Hi.I'm-I'm-"

"You must be Jubilee. Pleased to meet you."

Jubilee tilted her head in confusion.

"I am Professor Charles Xavier, founder and headmaster of the Institute."

"Nice to meet you too, Professor." Jubilee stammered.

"You may be wondering why I called you here so early." Xavier bluntly stated.

Jubilee nodded.

"Logan, you have the floor."

Jubilee watched as a somewhat younger-looking man rose from his chair.

"So, you're the firecracker from Los Angeles." the man mumbled.

"Is that a bad thing, Mister-"

"It isn't, kid. And call me Mister Logan."

"Okay, Mister Logan."

"Anyways, I'll cut to the chase on what the Professor's trying to get at. Want to hear?"

Jubilee nodded, and Logan cleared his throat.

"As you've probably figured out by now, you're a mutant. A lot of people don't really like mutants. That's one of the reasons old Chromedome here founded this school- wanted a place where young mutants could safely train to use their gifts and work on fostering positive relations between mutants and normal humans. Granted, we've only got about 30-50 normal human students here, but I'm pretty sure that's because we don't do much in the way of ad-"

"Get to the point, Logan." Xavier insisted.

"Unfortunately, there's another guy out there. Eastern European type, has a thing for purple and wears a funny helmet. Calls himself Magneto, and if we're being honest, he's got enough screws loose to fill a hardware store. Something about how mutants deserve to rule the world and all kinds of other nonsense. But he's charming enough to get followers- they call themselves the Brotherhood of Mutants."

"Shouldn't we be worried about this Brotherhood then?"

Rogue scoffed.

"I got conned into joining them before I got here. If what I saw applies to the whole Brotherhood, then their collective elevator doesn't go all the way to the top."

"Like Stripes here said. Granted, Magneto and his inner circle are pretty smart-" Logan replied.

"Anyways, let's introduce Jubilee to the rest of the team." Xavier interrupted.

* * *

A FEW MINUTES LATER:

"So let me get this straight. You're offering me a spot in your group and if I join, I get to do the world a favor?" Jubilee asked.

"That's the gist of it." Logan replied.

"I'm in."

Xavier turned to one of the men standing on either side of Logan.

"Mister McLean, would you do the honors?"

McLean reached into his jacket pocket and removed what looked like a wristwatch.

"Don't be shy. It's got an integrated cellphone, distress beacon, GPS, and it even tells time." he said in a calm, authoritative voice.

"Mister Turner, would you kindly give our new recruit a tour of the base?"

"On it, Charley."

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Yes, Turner and McLean are Hondo McLean and Brad Turner from _MASK_. If you're wondering how they got involved with the X-Men, it's going to be addressed when I get around to my _MASK_ fanfic. The short version is that the original incarnation of the X-Men helped out MASK in the '80s, and following the collapse of VENOM and the subsequent dissolution of MASK, McLean and Turner stuck around with the Institute.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Machinations of the Brotherhood

The desert air was still in the darkness of the night. Sitting there was what remained of Höllenfeur, Utah. It'd been a mining town back in the closing days of the Wild West, before the Maximals and Predacons fell to Earth. For the past 130 or so years, both it and the surrounding area had been only sporadically inhabited. In short, it was the perfect place for someone to hide something, namely a decently-sized compound on the site where the _Darksyde_ had crashed so many years ago. This was the current base of

* * *

"How goes the search?" a man's voice boomed.

Techrat swiveled his chair around.

"Found another one of those crystal things in Boston. Pietro'll have it- oh, he already brought it to the dead drop. Kid must've found out about it before I did." he muttered.

"That's my boy." the other man replied.

"How many of those things do you even need, Magneto?"

Magneto turned to face Techrat.

"That need not concern hired help such as you."

"Look, you promised you'd give me a crack at whatever you've got going! I've got a score to settle, and I have the feeling that you can help me do that."

Magneto levitated the chair off the ground.

"I believe our agreement was 'you scratch my back, I scratch yours', Techrat. You help me find the Crystals of Cyttorak, and I shall uplift you."

Just then, the doors of Magneto's control center opened up to reveal Mystique and Zartan. The chair went back down.

"How went the family bonding time?"

"We lost her. Last I heard, Xavier had taken her under his wing." Mystique snapped.

"And she got beat by the Holograms' guitarist." Zartan added.

Magneto smirked.

"Perhaps she would prove viable."

Just then, Techrat cleared his throat.

"Found another crystal. This one's at the Shore Museum in San Francisco." the latter announced.

"Inform Alvers and his cohorts, then."

"Hold your horses, Magneto. If you're sending those kids out across the country, then you'll let me and the Dreadnoks give them a hand. Otherwise, you'll have no hope of survival if and when a bigger fish comes along."

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTES:

If you've seen _X-Men: Evolution_ , you can guess what Magneto's scheme is here.

Regarding Techrat's presence, he's hired help like Magneto said. As for Zartan, he's in it for the money, and he's also COBRA's liaison to the Brotherhood of Mutants. To put it simply, the Brotherhood wouldn't last particularly long against groups like GI Joe or either faction of Transformers, and Magneto knows this. COBRA offers him protection and deniable muscle (Dreadnoks and Iron Grenadiers), while he offers COBRA a few aces in the hole (where do you think they got the know-how to turn Mara from a normal teenage girl into a blue-skinned amphibious teenage girl?)


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Now In Session, Part 1

"Hostile on your right! Use your fireworks!" Rogue shouted.

Jubilee turned and fired off her powers, sending a man in a flak jacket down to the ground.

"Got him!"

Rogue looked around and felt a series of small objects slam into her back, sending her sprawling to the ground.

" _Hasta la vista, mutie_."

She looked up and saw a man in a flak jacket standing above her, his rifle pointed at her forehead.

" _Good job everyone, that's a wrap. Shutting down the simulation…now._ "

The simulated urban warzone and the armed men vanished into thin air, revealing cold steel walls and robotic training dummies in their place.

" _Congratulations, Jubilee. You did a decent job for your first session in the Danger Room._ "

"Thanks, Mister Turner."

" _Now get out of there. The older members of the New Mutants are going in for their session soon._ "

"Got it."

* * *

"So, what's this 'Danger Room' you people keep going on about?"

Elizabeth Braddock sighed as she turned to the newest member of the New Mutants.

"Miss Montgomery-"

"Call me Clash, or Connie if you're feeling formal."

"Fine… _Clash_. The Danger Room is a simulated training environment-"

Just then, four or five figures emerged from the Danger Room and entered the small prep area.

"How'd it go?" Braddock asked as Rogue passed by.

"Could've gone better. Took a couple gel rounds to the back. Probably going to get some fresh bruises, but nothing major."

Clash gulped as the last group of trainees exited the prep area.

"They _shoot_ at us?" she asked.

"Relax, Connie. They're less than lethal gel rounds. If they hit you, they'll sting like hell and give you bruises, but you'll still be drawing breath."

"Yippie skippy."

The doors to the Danger Room opened.

" _Psylocke, Cannonball, Pixie, Wolfsbane, and Clash- step forward. For those about to rock, I salute you._ "

Braddock pressed down on the intercom.

"Don't be so dramatic, Mr. Turner."

" _I used to be a rock star! Sue me, Betsy!_ "

* * *

From an elevated gallery, a small group of individuals watched the Danger Room session.

"I swear, Turner, you're getting worse." Logan muttered.

"I'm a showman, _compadre_. Been doing it since the '80s."

"Uh huh. Were you this bad back when you were with MASK?"

McLean snorted.

"He was."

"Thanks for throwing me under the bus, Hondo! Some friend you are!"

Logan gave a faint smile.

"Anyways, how're they doing?"

* * *

"Hey! How come _she_ gets the energy katana? I want an energy katana!"

Cannonball darted across the room and pushed Clash to the ground just before another salvo of gel rounds filled the air.

"Don't just stand there! Get to cover!" he ordered.

* * *

"Everybody but the new lady's doing fine. Hey, Psylocke! You got a hostile- oh, you've already got a handle on it. Never mind."

Just then, there was a buzz on the intercom.

"Now who could that b-"

 _PUSH THE BUTTON, TURNER._

Brad did so.

" _I see you got my message._ "

"Professor, are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

" _No. As a tenured member of our staff, I can't afford to lose you._ "

"Right. Anyways, what's the big deal?"

" _Brotherhood's been sighted near San Francisco, along with some bikers called the…Dreadnoks?_ "

"Which members of the Brotherhood?"

" _The ones from around here. Avalanche's group._ "

"Why're you telling me? Shouldn't you be giving Jean or Scott this sort of info?"

" _I have a feeling you and Hondo are going to be needed, along with your old team._ "

Brad's jaw dropped.

"You want MASK? Professor, there is no way we can call up all those guys-"

" _You're forgetting something, Brad. We_ can _with some help._ "

"Cerebro? I thought that thing only worked for picking up mutant signatures-"

" _You thought wrong, ye of little faith. With some minor adjustments, I can find MASK's agents-_ "

"Then let me use it."

* * *

TEN MINUTES LATER:

"Wish me luck."

Xavier watched as Brad put Cerebro's headpiece on and closed his eyes.

* * *

 _Personnel selected: Matt Trakker, leader and jet pilot. Vehicle codename: Thunderhawk_.

* * *

TRAKKER MANSION- LOS ANGELES:

"Nice to meet you, Miss Leith. Scott's told me so much about you. Pity that David's reviews weren't so glowing."

Aja smiled as she took another drink of coffee.

"Thanks, Mr. Trakker. I'm especially glad to hear that'll you be donating to the Starlight-"

Just then, Matt Trakker put his fingers to his temples as he felt a buzzing in his head.

"Miss Leith, I've got to run."

* * *

 _Bruce Sato: mechanical engineer and specialist. Vehicle codename: Rhino_.

* * *

SATO TOYS- OAKLAND:

"Mister Sato, you've got a meeting with the board in thirty minutes-"

Bruce looked up from his desk.

"Do you mind, Amberley? I'm working on another new design-"

"Sir, you run the company. Why are you still designing toys?"

"Because I want to. Now tell th-"

Bruce pressed down on his temples as he felt a buzzing in his head.

"Tell the board that they'll have to wait. Duty calls."

* * *

 _Alex Sector: computer and communications specialist. Rhino systems commander._

* * *

SAN FRANCISCO ZOO:

"Alex, you've got 250 vacation days. I suggest you use them."

"But the animals would-"

Alex nodded as he felt a buzzing in his head.

"I think I'll take one of my personal days now."

* * *

 _Gloria Baker: martial arts expert and racecar driver. Vehicle codename: Shark._

* * *

BAKER'S DOJO- SAN FRANCISCO:

"OOF!" a hapless student exclaimed as he hit the mat.

Gloria Baker smiled as she flexed her muscles.

"And that's how you execute a judo th-"

Gloria pressed down on her temples.

"Sorry, class. I've got to run."

* * *

 _Buddie Hawks: master of disguise and intelligence expert. Vehicle codename: Firecracker_.

* * *

HAWKS' GARAGE- OAKLAND:

"And there's the problem right there. You've got a broken transaxle-"

Buddie nearly slammed his head against the car's underside as he heard a buzzing in his head. He rolled out on his creeper and addressed the customer.

"Sorry, sir. I've got to run. I'll finish up when I get back."

* * *

Brad removed the Cerebro helmet.

"You sure you got everyone?" Hondo asked.

"Everyone who we needed."

Professor Xavier cleared his throat.

"Do you want me to have your personal vehicles loaded onto the Blackbird?"

Both men nodded.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: Now In Session, Part 2

"I can do this all day!" Jubilee exclaimed.

Rogue smirked as she lobbed the squash ball across the court.

"You sure you want to, sugar? Because _I_ can do this all day too."

Just then, the duo's watches started blaring out a high-pitched tone. The time readout disappeared from the screens and was replaced by a flashing 'X'.

* * *

"The winner and still champion!"

"Jean, it was just a game of pool, not the final match of the World Series of Poker." Scott protested.

Boom-Boom muttered a few curses under her breath, and then she heard two blaring tones. She turned and saw Scott and Jean looking at their watches.

* * *

"So, have you seen the latest member of the New Mutants?"

Kitty looked up from her book.

"Not yet, Kurt. Heard about her, though."

Kurt was about to make a reply when he heard his watch go off. A quick glance downward confirmed that Kitty's watch was doing the same.

"The Professor's calling." the two said in unison.

Kurt disappeared with a _BAMF!_ and a cloud of smoke, while Kitty just phased through the wall.

* * *

PROFESSOR XAVIER'S OFFICE- A FEW MINUTES LATER:

"So let me get this straight. The Brotherhood's teaming up with a biker gang to do something in San Francisco?" Scott asked.

"That's the shape of things. Don't know what they're after, though." Hondo replied.

Xavier cleared his throat.

"I think I might know what they're looking for."

"Enlighten us." Brad snarked.

"One of the Crystals of Cyttorak."

"A which-what?" Jubilee asked.

"Some kind of weird crystal thing that can awaken mutant powers in 'normal' people. I believe the technical term for it is 'bad juju'." Brad snarked again.

"Thank you, Mister Turner. As of right now, you and Mister McLean are in charge."

Xavier turned to the others.

"Now go, my X-Men. To the Blackbird with you!"


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Now In Session, Part 3

" _Welcome aboard X-Airlines Flight Number I-Don't-Know. My name's Brad Turner, and I'll be your captain today. We remind you that this is a no-smoking flight- not that you should be smoking anyways. Also, keep your powers in their holst-_ " the intercom played.

" _Turner, be quiet. You're wasting time._ " Logan interrupted.

Jubilee adjusted her yellow longcoat as the Blackbird's engines sounded off.

"So, how fast does this thing go?"

Scott bit his lip.

"Somewhere in the neighborhood of Mach 5. Meaning we'll be in San Francisco in about…oh, 45 minutes."

Before Jubilee could make a reply, there was a roaring noise, and she was slammed back into her seat by G-forces.

" _We're the mighty power that can save the day! No one knows what lies behind the masquerade! Always riding hot on VEN- er, the Brotherhood's trail! Come see the laser rays! Fire away!_ " Brad sang over the intercom.

" _Anybody tell you that you're a real ham?_ " Logan snipped back.

* * *

45 MINUTES LATER:

"Entering San Francisco airspace. Logan, take the controls for me."

Logan nodded as Brad got up and headed towards the cockpit exit.

"You sure that you can bring it down safely?"

"God knows how many times I did it back in the '80s."

He grabbed an old mask from its current resting place.

"You sure that thing still works, Turner?"

"It should."

He put the mask on.

"Wish me luck."

* * *

Brad entered the Blackbird's cargo bay and approached a green motorcycle from the 1980s.

"Once more into the breach, old girl. Let's ride."

The intercom crackled.

" _You ready, Turner?_ " Logan asked.

"Ready as ever."

" _Opening cargo ramp._ "

There was a blaring klaxon, and then the cargo ramp opened.

 _It's go time_.

The motorcycle's engine revved, and then Brad raced out of the Blackbird.

" _YEE-HAW!_ " he whooped.

The motorcycle began to fall.

 _10,000 feet._ the altimeter in his mask read.

Brad's knuckles tightened around the handlebars.

 _9,000 feet._

His thumb reached out for a switch.

 _8,000 feet._

The switch clicked, and the rear half of the motorcycle rearranged itself. What looked to be the exhaust pipes rose up and surrounded Brad, and a pair of rotors and a set of landing skids extended outwards. The rear wheel became a rear rotor.

"Son of a- it works! The old girl still works! Condor rides again!" he shouted.

"Preparing for final approach." Logan announced.

He then stood up from his seat.

"Hondo, you sure about this?"

"I'm sure."

"Get down to the cargo bay. Hurricane's awaiting."

* * *

The Blackbird hovered low over the streets of San Francisco and deployed the cargo ramp once again. This time, a turquoise 1957 Chevrolet rolled out, followed shortly thereafter by the X-Men.

" _I'm going to find a place to land. Don't get too hurt while I'm gone._ " Logan announced.

Jean cracked a smile as she turned her watch to her face.

"Read you loud and clear."

The Blackbird rose back up into the sky and sped away.

"So, where's the Shore Museum?" Kitty asked.

Just then, a red Chevrolet Camaro G3 zipped overhead.

"Just follow that car." Hondo ordered.

* * *

"Where's the crystal?" Buzzer snarled.

The security guard struggled with his bonds as he surveyed the scene around him. He was tied to a chair and surrounded by uncouth bikers, an utterly massive young man with brown hair, a white-haired man that was about the same age, a short guy with dirty blond hair who was sitting like a frog, a Goth girl in a red-and-black ensemble, and a well-built young man with brown hair and wearing a leather jacket.

"C'mon. Give my friend an answer." the last individual urged.

"I'm not telling you anything!"

Just then, the building began to shake.

"What the-"

"Avalanche here has the power to start earthquakes. Unless you want him to bring the house down- and I do mean that quite literally- you'll talk." Zartan said.

"I have a family!"

Just then, Zartan's walkie-talkie squawked.

"What is it, Thrasher?"

" _You won't believe this, boss! There's a Camaro flying in towards the parking lot- what the hell? Is that a motorbike flying like a helicopter? What the hell is going on around here?!_ "

Zartan turned off the walkie-talkie.

"So, it appears that MASK is history no longer."

"What's MASK, yo?" the frog-like man asked.

Zartan groaned as he turned to face his minion.

"It's a private paramilitary group from the '80s, Toad. They broke up back in the early '90s- what are they doing back here?"

The humongous man grinned.

"They must be a bunch of old geezers now!"

"Don't doubt the elderly, Blob. Knowing them, they've probably kept in shape-"

Just then, the walkie-talkie squawked again.

"What is it now, Thrasher?"

" _X-MEN! THE X-MEN ARE HERE!_ "

Avalanche, Blob, Toad, and their cohorts smirked.

"You X-Freaks want a fight? Well, I'll rock you like a hurricane!" Avalanche yelled.

* * *

"So, you're the team Brad told us about. My name's Trakker- Matt Trakker."

"Scott Summers, but you can call me Cyclops. You know anything about what's going on?"

"About as much as you do. Can you fill me in on your team's abilities?"

Scott nodded, raised his arm, and began to point.

"Redhead over there? Her name's Jean Grey- she's our resident…what's the word I'm looking for? Psychic- no, she can't tell the future-"

"I think the term you're looking for is 'esper'."

"Sure, let's go with that. Basically, she's got telepathy and telekinesis."

Scott shifted his arm over to Kurt and Kitty.

"The guy who looks like a blue demon? His name's Kurt Wagner, but we call him Nightcrawler. He can teleport and climb around on walls and ceilings."

"And the girl?"

"Kitty Pryde, aka Shadowcat. She can phase through solid objects, usually walls or doors."

He pointed to Rogue and Jubilee.

"The girl with the skunk stripe? We call her Rogue. Her power…well, let's just say that if she touches you, she gets your powers if you've got them."

"And the girl in the yellow coat?"

"Newest member. We call her Jubilee. She shoots fireworks from her fingertips."

"What do you do?"

Scott gestured to the visor around his eyes.

"Beams of concussive of force. To put it bluntly, I'm packing a bazooka behind each eyeball."

Matt nodded.

"Any ideas, Sc- er, Cyclops?"

"You've been through stuff like this before, if what Mr. Turner said is true. Do you have any ideas?"

Before Matt could answer, he saw a maroon Kenworth semi tractor pull into the museum parking lot, followed shortly thereafter by an orange pickup truck and a white Porsche 928.

"Yeah. I've got a few."

At that moment, four masked figures emerged from the vehicles. A few seconds later, the Condor landed, and Brad walked forward.

"My God…it's like the '80s all over again…" he murmured.

"Brad, we'll save the sentimental stuff for after this." Matt replied.

"What's the plan, Mister Turner?" Scott asked.

"It's simple- Trakker's gonna lead the mission!" Brad announced.

"And Spectrum's got such super vision!" Gloria replied.

Just then, the radio in the Camaro squawked.

"Hello, this is Thunderhawk. Identify yourself."

" _Matt, it's me- Hondo. Just wanted to let you know that Hurricane and I took care of the Dreadnoks' vehicles._ "

"What's the battle plan?"

" _We're going in with the X-Men. From there, it looks like we'l have to make stuff up on the fly._ "

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Yes, there're several references to the MASK theme in here. For that, I am NOT sorry. Also, in case you're wondering which MASK member got which mask (trust me, these guys have a LOT of masks), here's the guide for who's showing up this time:

Matt Trakker: Spectrum

Bruce Sato: Lifter

Hondo MacLean: Blaster

Alex Sector: Jack Rabbit

Gloria Baker: Collider/Aura

Brad Turner: Hocus-Pocus

Buddie Hawks: Penetrator


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Now In Session, Part 4

"Olly olly oxen free!" Brad shouted as the combined team of MASK and the X-Men walked through the abandoned lobby of the museum.

Matt's palm collided with the front of Spectrum.

"Good one, Turner." he griped.

"Just trying to draw them ou-"

As if on cue, a silvery blur darted into the room.

"What the-" Gloria sputtered as the blur materialized into a white-haired young man in a blue and silver ensemble.

"Oh goody! The X-Freaks are here to try and save the day! And who's with them but a band of washed-up relics from the '80s? If it weren't so hysterically obvious that you're no match for us, I'd weep for you bunch!"

"When one lives in a new age, one must not forget the advantage of the ol-" Bruce began.

The man raced over and knocked Bruce over.

"Where'd you get that one? Fortune cookie? Well, I got news for you, grandpa! You're outdated! Obsolete! Ya hear me?!"

"Yeah, and so does everyone from here to Redding, Quicksilver!" Rogue snapped.

"Oh, you know my name! Now if you can write it, you get a gold star!"

Just then, a cash register floated up.

"So, how about I give one of you fine ladies the best five minutes of your life, and then you let me and my buddies walk away?"

The cash register flew towards the back of Quicksilver's head and missed, smashing into a wall instead.

"Too slow! You can't hit me!"

Just then, Matt got an idea.

"Hey, Quicksilver! Catch!"

Quicksilver darted out and grabbed an object about the size of a cigarette pack in midair.

"What'd I get?" he demanded.

"A booby prize."

The object suddenly lit up, dazing the mutant speedster.

"Gets them every time."

Gloria cleared her throat.

"Yes, Miss Baker?"

"Matt, you got anything on the other hostiles?"

"I'll have something in a moment. Spectrum, on."

Behind his mask, Matt watched as shapes coalesced behind the walls in colors unseeable to the naked eye.

"Got two of them about 15, 20 meters away. One male, one female."

Just then, a wall cracked up, and Avalanche and Scarlet Witch burst through it.

"All that's missing is for one of you guys to scream 'Oh yeah!' at the top of your lungs." Jean snarked.

Behind his mask, Brad's eyes went wide as he noticed a striking resemblance between Avalanche and himself.

 _No…he can't be…_

"Something wrong, old man?" Avalanche sneered.

"Hocus-Pocus, on!"

As if on cue, a holographic doppelgänger of Brad made a mad dash towards the doorway, while the actual Brad sprinted in the opposite direction.

"What just happened?" Scarlet Witch stammered.

* * *

" _The girl you saw before- that's not the real me! The girl who made you sore- that's not the real me!_ " Brad nervously sang to himself as he ducked behind a kiosk.

Suddenly, the kiosk exploded.

"What the f-"

Standing before the smoldering remains of the kiosk was the Scarlet Witch herself, hands outstretched and brandishing dark red bolts of energy.

"Good girl. Nice girl. Easy breezy beautiful clever girl."

There was a cloud of smoke as Kurt teleported in.

"Any advice?"

"Yeah. Hold on to your butts."

"Wait, wh-"

 _BAMF!_

Scarlet Witch coughed as the smoke cleared away. Her gaze focused on Gloria.

"Eat hex bolts, MASK goon!"

The hex bolts went flying through the air.

"Aura, on!"

The bolts struck an invisible barrier surrounding Gloria.

"What the f-"

Gloria chuckled.

"Ever hear the phrase 'turnabout is fair play'?"

Scarlet Witch went flying backwards as she was hit by a laser beam from Aura.

* * *

"And open sesame!"

The door to the museum vault opened as Zartan, Toad, Ripper, and Buzzer stood outside.

"The crystal is in here somewhere-"

Just then, a blur darted into the vault.

"That you, Pietro?" Toad asked.

"Close, but no cigar."

Toad's face donned an expression of horror as he saw Rogue barreling out towards him like Quicksilver.

"Don't hurt me! Please don't hurt m-"

Buzzer readied his chainsaw and swung it at the greenish blur darting around the room.

"For the love of God, use a gun!" Zartan hissed.

Ripper raised his rifle and opened fire, missing Rogue by a country mile.

"Do you not know how to _aim?!_ "

Meanwhile, Toad had managed to slip into the vault.

"Yo, Zartan! I found the rock!"

Zartan nodded and beckoned to his goons.

"Buzzer, Road Pig, and Ripper- one of you is going to carry this thing!"

The trio of Dreadnoks looked into the vault and saw a crystal about as big as a large child.

"I'll lug it." Buzzer groaned.

Just then, Kitty Pryde and Buddie Hawks materialized in the vault.

"Want me to shoot them?" Ripper asked.

"Not on your life! Given your aim, you might hit the crystal!"

Before Kitty and Buddie could do anything, Road Pig slammed their heads together, stunning them long enough so that he and his cohorts could escape.

* * *

Hondo MacLean was sitting in his car and admiring his handiwork from a distance. What had once been the Dreadnoks' bikes was now a smoking mass of twisted metal.

"This'll cut them off at the pass." he muttered to himself.

As if on cue, the Brotherhood and Dreadnoks filed out, with Road Pig and Ripper carrying Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch over their shoulders.

"What the hell? Who trashed our rides?!" Ripper snapped.

"It doesn't matter. We have backups." Zartan replied.

"What backups? You going to call cabs for us?"

Just then, a number of silver spheres descended from the sky.

"Those backups."

Hondo watched as the spheres took up the assembled Brotherhood and Dreadnoks and then flew away.

* * *

THE X-JET- A FEW MINUTES LATER:

"I know what I saw, Logan."

"I'm not doubting you, bub. Just let me talk to Charles first."

Logan adjusted the radio.

"X-Jet to base. Come in, base."

" _Logan, I trust you have good news._ "

"That's a big 'negative', Chuck. According to the Half-Pint, the Brotherhood made off with that crystal. Also, we should get to writing checks to the Shore Foundation- there was a dustup in the museum lobby."

" _I see. Xavier out._ "

Logan turned to face Brad.

"You okay, Turner?"

"He can't be…he can't be…"

"Who can't be what?"

"Avalanche."

"What about him?"

"Back at the museum, I got a good look at him. He…my God, he's a dead ringer for me when I was his age! And those eyes- he's got Vanessa's eyes!"

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

If you're wondering who "Vanessa" is here, she's Vanessa Warfield from the MASK cartoon, where she was Miles Mayhem's second-in-command. During the "racing episodes", she and Brad Turner seemed to have a thing for each other, and she fell for him in the series finale. As far as Earth-H is concerned, these episodes didn't happen, and VENOM's fall was brought about by Vanessa singing like a canary to both SHIELD and MASK, leading to VENOM being forcibly dismantled. At present, VENOM agents Sly "Wrecker" Rax, Cliff "Blaster" Dagger, Bruno "Mad Dog" Sheppard, Nash "Goon" Gorey, and Floyd "Birdman" Malloy are being kept behind the frozen peas at a SHIELD facility in South Dakota (read: put in cryonic suspension). Miles Mayhem is a whole other story- to put it simply, his whereabouts are unknown, and nobody's even sure he's still alive anymore. Vanessa's working for SHIELD, and she's Brad's ex-wife. And if you're wondering if Avalanche is really Brad's son, I'm not telling you!


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15: Mankind Redefined, Part 1

"It is complete. My magnum opus- the Genetic Enhancer- has been created." Magneto proclaimed.

Techrat looked at what Magneto was gesturing at.

"It's a short tunnel, boss. What's it supposed to do?"

Magneto used his powers to lift the hired hacker off the ground by the lapels.

"Its purpose is simple. Person goes in, gets exposed to radiation from the Crystals of Cyttorak, and they either develop powers or get their current one enhanced. No, Mystique- you and Sabertooth aren't going to be using it."

" _Spoilsport._ " a gruff voice muttered in the background.

"So, who's first?" Techrat asked.

"You are. Consider it your reward for aiding me."

Techrat grinned as he sauntered into the Genetic Enhancer. Once he was inside, Magneto closed the door behind him.

"Activate the machine." he ordered.

* * *

"Yes…yes…after all these years of being mocked, scorned, cheated, and nagged, I _will_ show those sheep who's in charge! Oh, what powers am I going to get? Psychic powers? A healing factor? Flight? Super strength? I can't wait!"

Just then, Techrat was bathed in the power of the Crystals of Cyttorak.

" _No guts, no glory! No pain, no gain!_ "

At that moment, the crystals gave off a tremendous burst of energy. With that burst of energy, Techrat ascended into the cosmos to a place where joy is everlasting and fear is but a memory.

* * *

"It's working!" Magneto exclaimed.

"Remember that it was _my_ theories and _my_ legwork that led to this moment." Mystique piped up.

"Yeah, but what's he going to get?" Sabertooth asked.

"We'll find out in a moment."

The machine powered down, the door opened, and Techrat emerged.

"What went wrong? He doesn't look to have changed in the least!"

"Silence, Creed! I'm monitoring h-"

Just then, a nearby radio started playing.

"Who-"

" _I did, Magneto! I did it!_ " Techrat proclaimed over the radio.

"A technopath? That was unexpected." Mystique thought out loud.

"We need more subjects. Perhaps you can direct us to them?"

Just then, the printer came to life. Mystique grabbed the paper and read. Upon it was a list of names- Kimberly Benton, Mary Phillips, and Aja Leith.

"Excellent."

* * *

XAVIER MANSION:

"Charles, let me get this straight. You're saying that shortly after the Brotherhood got their paws on that crystal, Cerebro picked up a new mutant signature?" Logan asked.

"I did. Strange thing is that it was coming from a deserted part of Utah."

"Lemme guess- it was near a ghost town called Höllenfeur?"

"How'd you know?"

"I was there around the mid-to-late 1880s and got caught up in something called the Beast Wars. It's a long story."

Xavier turned around to face a man with graying blond hair.

"Mister Trakker, your thoughts?"

"It's just like old times again. Just switch out 'Miles Mayhem' for 'Magneto' and 'VENOM' for 'the Brotherhood and COBRA'."

"Mister Turner?"

Brad cleared his throat.

"If you ask me, we're going to need the whole MASK team if we're taking on Magneto."

"How are we going to get them all together?"

"Same way I contacted you. Cerebro."

Matt nodded.

"Professor, may I?"

Xavier nodded and gave Matt the Cerebro headpiece.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Mankind Redefined, Part 2

"Now, time to check in with our inside man at Xavier's." Mystique announced.

She sat down before a laptop and watched as a man's face materialized.

"Hello, Remy. How goes it?"

" _Gambit needs more money. You don't pay, I sign up with Xavier for real._ "

Mystique clenched her fist.

"You'll get your payment, LeBeau. Right now, I need you to do me a favor."

" _And what might that favor be?_ "

"Take down Xavier's defense mainframe."

" _Who do you think I am? Caprica Six?_ "

"That was so funny I forgot to laugh. Now get to work."

* * *

"How's it going on putting the band back together?" Hondo asked.

Matt turned around to face his old cohort.

"It's coming along. Dusty, Julio, Jacques, and Boris all got the message, and they're going to be heading here."

"Good to hear. I just hope it'll be enough."

* * *

"Oh, Network. Why don't you patch up the defense mainframe? Oh, Network! My spam filter's gone bust, would you please fix it?"

Sarah Vale continued to gripe to nobody in particular as she finished making adjustments to the mainframe. Just then, she heard footsteps.

"Who's there?"

"Nobody but little old Gambit, _cherie_."

Sarah turned her head to focus on the Cajun.

"Hey, Mr. LeBeau. What brings you here?"

"Just wandering around. Say, mind if I do some work with the mainframe?"

"You know anything about tech?"

"Of course I do!"

"Good. Password's 'Cassandra1140701'. All caps, no spaces."

Gambit smirked as Sarah walked away. Once she was gone, he began work on compromising the mainframe.

* * *

BROTHERHOOD'S LAIR- UTAH:

"When do we bring in the next batch of subjects?" Techrat griped.

"We grab 'em when we get an opening, yo!" Toad replied.

Techrat's gaze shifted over to Quicksilver.

"How about we go and take initiative? Pietro, you can run over to Los Angeles, correct?"

"Can, but won't."

The printer activated again.

"Here're the addresses of our soon-to-be…cohorts. Avalanche, you go on this mission."

"And if I refuse?"

Techrat smirked.

"You seem to be forgetting that I can control technology. All I need to do is figure out how to access them, and I can obliterate every trace of your legal identity. Your driver's license, birth certificate, social security number-"

He held out his hand and exhaled.

"-all dust in the wind."

Avalanche gulped.

"Very well, then. I'll go along with this."

"Good to see you're going with the program. Now, I've prepared a flight pod for you and your captives. Here's the list."

Techrat thrust his hand out and handed Avalanche a piece of paper.

"Now if you can also snag Phyllis Gabor, that'd be lovely." the former added.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Gambit's wisecrack about "Caprica Six" is a reference to the 2003 version of _Battlestar Galactica_. Also, the mainframe password is a reference to the comics villain Cassandra Nova, who first appeared in _New X-Men_ #114, which was released in July 2001.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17: Mankind Redefined, Part 3

STARLIGHT MANSION:

" _Today's headline- the Shore Museum in San Francisco was attacked last night by the infamous Brotherhood of Mutants. According to eyewitnesses, the notorious mutant terrorist organization clashed with the paramilitary group known as the X-Men, and some report to have seen personnel from MASK be involved in the incident. If these reports are true, it would be the first time in over twenty years that MASK was involved in any-_ "

Jessica clicked off the television.

"Why do I have the feeling that there's something more to this?"

"I know what you mean, Jess. Why would the Brotherhood go in after visiting hours if they wanted to make a point? And for that matter, why only take one item-"

"What item?"

"Some rare mineral specimen called the 'Crystal of Cyttorak'. Why do you ask?"

Just then, there was a rumbling, and the house began to shake.

"Everyone get to cover!"

Just then, the living room windows shattered, and a set of metallic tendrils snaked in.

"What the hell is going on here?!" Aja screamed.

The tendrils lunged forward and snaked around Aja's waist.

"Kimber! Get the guns!"

"On it!"

Before Kimber could make it out of the room, the tendrils snagged her and pulled her in.

"Somebody! Anybody! _HELP!_ " she squealed.

Just then, there was a scream from the Gabors' place.

"Oh God- they got Stormer!" Kimber yelled.

Jessica watched in terror as her sisters and Stormer were loaded into a pair of silvery spheres.

"No! This can't be happening!"

The spheres rose up and flew off.

" _YOU BASTARDS!_ " Jessica screeched.

* * *

SEVERAL MINUTES LATER:

"Run that by me one more time."

Synergy sighed.

" _Based upon my findings, I have determined that the objects responsible for abducting Kimber, Aja, and Stormer are identical to those sighted over portions of northern Utah in the past few months._ "

"Who did it?"

" _I…have no idea. But I can-_ "

Just then, Jessica's phone rang.

"Hello?"

" _Miss Benton, I presume?_ "

"You presumed correctly, Mister Trakker."

" _Good. Listen, I know about what happened near your house-_ "

"How?"

" _It's a long story. But right now, I can tell you who's responsible._ "

"Who?"

" _The Brotherhood of Mutants._ "

Jessica's jaw nearly hit the floor.

" _I can tell you're angry right now. But I can help you._ "

"How?"

" _Hold out for about half an hour and you'll see._ "

The call ended.

" _What're you going to do now, Jessica?_ " Synergy asked.

"I'm going to gear up. Right now, it's no more Miss Nice Benton."

With that, she unclipped the earrings and put them back in their box.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18: Mankind Redefined, Part 4

"What was that?"

" _You heard me, Remy. You won't be getting a penny anymore._ "

"We had a deal, Mystique!"

" _Key word being_ had. _Past tense. You've outlived your usefulness to the Brotherhood. Be sure to say hello to the Iron Grenadiers for me._ "

"You duplicitous b-"

The call ended.

"If she thinks Gambit's going down, she's dead wrong!"

Gambit reached for his cellphone.

"Hello, Mister Xanatos?"

" _Mister LeBeau! It's been too long._ "

"Look, I need a favor. Can you send me a copter sometime in the neighborhood of…right now?"

" _Not pro bono._ "

"How about I work for you in exchange?"

" _Deal._ "

Gambit hung up.

* * *

Jessica gritted her teeth as she looked herself over in the mirror. She'd borrowed Sandra's exosuit to give her an extra edge in the fight to come. A bandolier full of shotgun shells was strapped across the chest, while an Ithaca 37 was mounted on her back.

"Kimber, I'm coming for you." she muttered.

* * *

" _Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again._ " the stereo played.

Pizzazz winced as she fitted on her body armor.

" _Because a vision softly creeping/left its seeds while I was sleeping._ "

She reached for the pistol Destro had given her back during the Holograms' and Misfits' visit to Cobra Island and loaded it.

" _And the vision that was planted in my brain- still remains! Still remains in the sound of silence._ "

She grabbed Roxy's .357 magnum revolver and loaded it as well.

" _In restless dreams I walked alone/narrow streets of cobblestone._ "

She grabbed her old fencing sword and gave a few experimental swings.

"' _Neath the halo of a street lamp/I turned my collar to the cold and damp._ "

She walked out of the basement.

" _When my eyes were stabbed/by the flash of a neon light! That split the night!_ "

She walked out the front door and saw a colossal black jet hovering above the yard.

" _And touched the sound of silence._ "


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19: Mankind Redefined, Part 5

"So let me get this straight. You're saying that the Brotherhood of Mutants kidnapped my sisters and Pizzazz's bandmate because they're looking for guinea pigs for a machine that can turn normal people into mutants?" Jessica asked.

Scott nodded.

"That's about the shape of things. What I don't understand is how you were able to call in GI Joe for help."

"I've got friends in there."

* * *

WESTCHESTER COUNTY, NEW YORK:

"Are we there yet?"

Sawbones sighed as he loaded his rifle with rubber bullets.

"No, Psi-Spy. We are not there yet."

Another hand shot up.

"Tinman?"

" _Why are we using less-than-lethal rounds?_ "

"We don't kill kids, for one. Also, we can't recruit corpses."

* * *

"So, how much longer will we be before we-" Pizzazz began.

"Half an hour, Miss Gabor." Jean butted in.

* * *

About three or four M1126 ICVs rolled up to the Xavier Institute. From the X-Men's base, Professor Xavier's eyes grew wide as saucers as he saw the Iron Grenadiers' insignia.

 _Hopefully the defense systems will dissuade them_ -

Just then, a concealed speaker in his desk went off.

" _What'd I tell you? Our man LeBeau took care of the defenses._ "

Xavier cleared his head and sent out a message.

 _Piotr, Hank, Ororo- gather the New Mutants and the rest of the X-Men here, then report to me immediately._

* * *

SOMEWHERE OVER CENTRAL NEVADA:

"Let me get this straight. We're going up against the _Brotherhood of Mutants_?!"

Duke sighed.

"Yes, Rock'N'Roll. We are. We're working with some outfit calling themselves the 'X-Men' while they try to pull off some kind of rescue mission. After they're done, we're storming whatever they're going into."

* * *

HÖLLENFEUR, UTAH:

"We're making our final approach. Mr. Trakker, let's hope that your team's as ready as we are." Jean announced into the Blackbird's radio.

* * *

Near Magneto's compound was a large freshwater pond. Its purpose was to help provide cooling water for the machinery used by the compound's owners. And at that moment, three vehicles- an orange Jeep CJ7, a white Porsche 928, and a black Chevy Corvette- were approaching it.

"Just like old times, am I right?" Gloria asked.

" _Sure is! Let's roll!_ " Dusty Hayes replied over the radio.

As they got to the shore of the lake, Gloria watched as the body of the Jeep raised up and an orange hydroplane shot out.

 _Yeah, it's just like old times._

The Porsche drove into the lake, and four diving planes extended from the fenders. Above the surface, the Corvette's wheels shifted around and the reverse gull-wing doors opened. Once this was done, the vehicle began to hover above the pond.

* * *

Back aboard the Blackbird, Logan looked around at the assembled X-Men and the two guests.

"I was never good at speeches, but here's what I've got. Right now, Magneto and his cronies have an extremely potent weapon at their disposal. Our job is to take away that new toy of his so he can't use it to be a pain in the world's side. Unfortunately for us, he's got more than just that. He's got a bunch of superpowered psychopaths on his side, plus a contingent of COBRA goons."

There was silence was Logan thought up the rest of his speech.

"Fortunately, we've got some tricks up our sleeves that he doesn't. We've got MASK backing us up. We've got GI Joe waiting for us to pull this off so they can deal with the Brotherhood. And we've got two gals who're willing to fight at our side. What do you say? You ready to kick Magneto in the pills?"

"YEAH!"

"You ready to help save a world that hates and fears us?"

"YEAH!"

"Firecracker, are you ready to earn your stripes?"

Jubilee nodded.

"Then let's ride."


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20: Mankind Redefined, Part 6

XAVIER INSTITUTE:

"Any more questions?"

The assembled New Mutants and remaining X-Men shook their heads.

"Very well. Hank, you want to close us out?"

A seven-foot tall man who looked similar to an azure-furred sasquatch cleared his throat.

"In the words of Admiral Horatio Nelson, England expects every man to do his duty. Dismissed."

* * *

The mansion's front lawn had become a battleground as Ororo and Piotr fought against the swarming Iron Grenadiers.

"How much longer until the mainframe comes back online?" the former asked.

"I've no idea, Storm! Now get back to helping me hold out against these ruffians!"

Metal-Head smirked as he readied his assault cannon.

"Yo, muties! I got something for you!"

Piotr turned around to face the Grenadiers' heavy weapons specialist.

" _BANG! BANG!_ "

As if on cue, two high-explosive shells soared through the air.

"Colossus!"

Just before the shells made impact, Piotr's body turned into a towering mass of organic steel.

"What the f-"

"Now, Ororo!"

Ororo cleared her throat.

" _POWER OF LIGHTNING, I COMMAND YOU TO SMITE THESE WASTRELS!_ "

As if on cue, a freak bolt of dry lightning fell from the heavens and shorted out most of the BATs that were ascending up the lawn.

* * *

MAGNETO'S COMPOUND- UTAH:

"You fools! Is your aim really that poor?!" Magneto thundered.

The hapless COBRA Vipers manning the compound's anti-air guns tensed up in fear.

"Techrat, tell me you can-"

"Sorry, boss. I'm good, but I'm not a miracle worker."

Just then, an alarm sounded.

" _Magneto, we've got a breach!_ " a voice yelled over the intercom.

"Where, Mystique?"

" _Front gate- HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!_ "

* * *

"As they say back home, truck you!" Alex Sector yelled as the maroon Kentworth known as "Rhino" smashed through the compound's main gate.

"Good one, Sector."

"Thanks, Sato."

* * *

"Let's have some music here…okay, I did not expect Sandra to be a fan of Judas Priest, Iron Maiden, AC/DC, or N.R.G. Let's see here…'Instruments of Destruction'. Hit 'play', roll tape." Jessica muttered to herself.

The inside of the suit's helmet rapidly became an echo chamber as the opening notes of the song blared.

"Let's ride." she announced as she disembarked from the Blackbird.

" _Iron birds of fortune/adrift above the skies!_ "

* * *

" _Cloudy revelations/unseen by naked eyes!_ "

Across the country, the same song blared in the halls of the Xavier Mansion.

"Rahne, Sam, Megan, Andrea- you go left! Clash, Lydia, Ray- you're with me!" Betsy ordered.

"On it, Psylocke!" Sam replied.

Clash nodded as she chambered a gel round into a pistol.

* * *

" _Flying tools of torment/will penetrate the sphere!_ "

Jessica fired her shotgun into the throng of Vipers flocking out to engage the X-Men and MASK. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Pizzazz running into the morass, brandishing her pistols and firing wildly.

" _EAT BUCKSHOT, YOU BASTARDS!_ " she screamed.

* * *

"Nothing moves the Blob!"

"We'll see about that, you walking mass of lard! Sato, do it!" Alex yelled.

"Lifter- on!"

Blob was soon torn free of the ground and flung through the air.

"Good work, Sato."

* * *

"OPEN FIRE ON THE REDHEAD!" a Viper leader shouted.

Jean readied herself as the bullets flew. Before they could make impact, they seemed to stop in mid-air.

"What the hell?!" a Viper sputtered.

"Telekinesis. Mind over matter."

The bullets fell harmlessly to the ground.

"Now, care to tell me where Magneto's keeping the prisoners?"

"I'm not telling you a thing, bitch!"

Just then, the Viper clutched his head in pain.

* * *

 _You ever see_ Scanners _?_ Jean mentally asked.

 _What?_

Scanners _. The movie where the psychic makes a guy's head explode._

 _You wouldn't dare!_

 _Tell me where Magneto's keeping the prisoners, or I'll do something far worse._

 _What?_

 _I'll make it so that hear Cobra Commander singing opera every waking moment of your existence._

 _I'll squeal! I'll squeal!_

* * *

" _Erupt the rock of ages/bringing final fear!_ "

"You think you can take me?! You think you can take me?!" an Iron Grenadier in power armor bellowed.

"I can." Betsy replied.

The Grenadier charged forward like a freight train, while Betsy leapt up into the air like a wuxia heroine.

"You know who I am?! I'm the Dreadnought, bitch!"

"Nice meeting you then. Now please bugger off."

Dreadnought's smug grin turned to a look of sheer horror as a purple energy katana materialized in Betsy's hand.

"What the-"

The katana cut through Dreadnought's armor like a hot blade through butter. There was a brief flash of pain, and then the Grenadier fell unconscious.

* * *

" _Instruments of destruction! Tools of power play!_ "

Click. Click. Click.

Pizzazz swore under her breath at the now-empty revolver.

"Can't toss you. Roxy would kill me." she muttered as she holstered the gun.

Just then, she felt a buzzing in her head.

 _What's going on?_

 _Miss Gabor, it's me. Jean Grey._

 _Who?_

 _Redhead in the plane. Sorry if I startled you. Should have known you weren't familiar with telepathy._

 _Save the apologies. What's the deal?_

 _I know where your friend and Miss Benton's sisters are._

* * *

" _It's a violent eruption! Existence strips away!_ "

Lyra Carrington winced as she felt a blade slash away at her.

"Slice and dice! Slice and dice!" the Grenadier shouted.

Lyra looked down and saw her blood dripping from the wound.

"What's the matter? Afraid of a little b-"

A whip made of blood slammed into the Grenadier.

* * *

" _What's it really matter/when nothing really counts?_ "

Logan looked at the man at the end of the hallway.

"Glad you could make it, runt."

"Sabertooth."

"It's been a good run, Logan. The trenches of the Somme, the jungles of El Salvador, and now we're back where we started. But today, it ends."

"Couldn't agree with you more, bub."

Logan flashed out his claws and walked up to his old rival.

* * *

" _Grave eternal darkness/when you are drained of every ounce!_ "

Magneto looked over his trio of captives.

"Do you have _any_ powers?"

"Yeah. We can all drive stick _and_ automatic." Aja snarked.

Magneto bit his lip.

"Well, that is impressive. But enough talk. Into the Genetic Enhancer you go."

* * *

" _And when the nightmare's over- the final from the storm! Dust of all creation! To ashes we transform!_ "

Jessica strained as she ripped the door to Magneto's central command center free of its hinges.

"Who dares-"

There was a gunshot, and Magneto instinctively activated his powers.

"You _dare_ attack a god among men?! Do you not know who I am?"

"Enlighten me." Jessica snapped.

"I am Magneto, Master of Magnetism!"

"Thanks for the intro."

"You are welcome. You are welcome…TO DIE!"

Jessica went flying through a window and landed right in front of the Genetic Enhancer.

"Once your sisters and friend are done, it will be your turn-"

Jessica rose up and punched a hole through the door.

"I told you we shouldn't have gone with the lowest bidder." Mystique snarked.

"SHUT UP, MYSTIQUE!"

* * *

" _Instruments of destruction! Tools of power play!_ "

"Hello? Who's there?"

Jessica bolted towards the voice.

"Kimber! Are you okay?"

"My head's kind of swimmy-"

"Hang on, little sis. Jess is here."

* * *

" _It's a violent eruption! Existence strips away!_ "

"Can't stop me! Can't touch me!" Quicksilver taunted as he zipped around some of the MASK personnel.

Julio Lopez turned to one of his old friends.

"Boris, distract him for me."

" _Da._ Comrade- on!"

Quicksilver turned around and was dazed by red star-shaped bursts of energy.

"Streamer- on!" Julio exclaimed.

Just then, Quicksilver recovered and lunged at Boris. Before he could get very far, he found himself stuck to something.

"What the- I'VE BEEN GLUED TO THE GROUND!" he sputtered.

* * *

" _Instruments of destruction! Tools of power play!_ "

Gloria and Dusty were taking out Magneto's generators.

"Backlash- on!"

A blast of kinetic energy ripped through one of the generators' safety systems, shutting the thing down.

"It's just like when we took out that earthquake machine in '85!" Gloria piped up.

Just then, two figures entered the room.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Gloria and Dusty turned and saw Avalanche and Scarlet Witch standing before them.

"Taking out your base. What does it look like?"

"Well, if that's the way you're going to play it-" Avalanche began.

"This isn't worth bringing the base down on our heads. GI Joe's inbound-"

Avalanche and Scarlet Witch gawked.

"The Joes? Here?"

"Yeah. To quote a favorite movie, come with me if you want to live."

* * *

"The guns. They've run dry." Techrat muttered.

Just then, the radio squawked.

" _Attention, Magneto. This is Sergeant Conrad S. Hauser of GI Joe. Effective immediately, you are under orders to stand down. If you refuse, we_ will _eliminate you. Your response?_ "

Magneto reached for the radio.

"In the words of a great American general- nuts."

Techrat gulped and ran.

"Where do you think _you're_ going?!" Magneto thundered.

"I'm not going down with the ship!" came the reply.

* * *

A FEW MINUTES LATER:

The Blackbird darted off into the sky as the forces of GI Joe stormed the compound.

"I wonder how everything's going back home." Logan said to himself as the plane flew eastward.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21: Mankind Redefined, Epilogue

THE PIT:

"Sir, we went over the compound's remains with a fine-toothed comb. It looks like Magneto, his goons, and the Dreadnoks all flew the coop before we could get to them." Duke announced.

"We get any of them?" Hawk asked.

Snake Eyes cleared his throat.

"I got Sabertooth."

"How?"

* * *

" _Give it up, runt! You're history!" Sabertooth snarled._

" _Not so fast, bub. I'm made of sterner stuff than you'd think."_

 _Sabertooth let out a blood-curdling yell as he charged towards Logan._

" _End of the line, Wolverine!"_

 _Just then, a shape was seen darting overhead._

" _What the f-"_

 _The shape descended and landed right between Sabertooth and Logan._

" _An interloper, huh? Guess I'll have to teach you a l-"_

 _Logan watched as the shape drew out a wakizashi and slashed away at his opponent._

Arashikage? Here? _Logan thought._

 _Just then, he felt a buzzing in his head._

" _What do you mean they're going to start an artillery barrage? Yeah, I'm on my way out._ "

* * *

"If we're being honest, he couldn't have survived that, especially since he was bleeding out all over the place."

"I see. And our captives?"

"According to Scarlett and Roadblock, we apprehended Quicksilver, Blob, Toad, and some new guy named Techrat." Duke replied.

"What about-"

"X-Men and MASK took Avalanche and Scarlet Witch."

* * *

THE HELLFIRE CLUB- NEW YORK CITY BRANCH:

"So, Magneto's little plan fell through." a man's voice intoned.

"It appears it did. What we have here is an opportunity to put our foot in the door and our finger another pie."

Emma Frost turned to a man in a black suit and red tie.

"Well, Eric. Time to see if we really did wipe your slate clean."

* * *

XAVIER INSTITUTE:

" _I'm an alligator, I'm a mama-papa coming for you_!"

Jessica Benton's eyes fluttered open as she came to in a hospital room. Beside her was a bed buzzer and a glass of water.

"Where…where am I?"

" _You're in a safe place._ " a voice announced.

Jessica's eyes darted around the room before they focused on a seven-foot tall ape-like man covered in blue fur and wearing a set of horn-rimmed glasses.

"Please don't scream. It disturbs Annie."

"Who…what…are you?"

"Hank McCoy, resident polymath here at the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters. And you are?"

"Jessica Benton, head of Starlight Records. Now why am I here?"

Hank sighed.

"During your little commando raid with the others in Utah, you took some exposure from the Crystals of Cyttorak. Granted, that power armor of yours provided a good of shielding, but we're checking to see if- oh, those are the test results right now."

Hank picked up the readouts and scanned them.

"Just like I thought. You didn't get enough exposure to fully mutate, but you were still affected."

"I feel-"

Jessica turned and looked in a nearby mirror. The reflection gazing back at her was somewhat different than the one she was used to on account of the increased muscle tone on her body.

"My God…it's like I went through boot camp…" she muttered as she ran a finger over her stomach.

"As for the others, I suppose you'll want to hear about them."

Jessica vigorously nodded.

* * *

A FEW MINUTES LATER:

"Let me get this straight. Kimber and Stormer both have psychic powers, and Aja's a…a…"

"Speedster. Now, are you sure that you don't want them to sign up w-"

"Mister McCoy, they're fully grown and legal adults. If they said no, then there's their answer."

Just then, a thought crossed Jessica's mind.

"What about Miss Gabor?"

"She didn't get any exposure to the Crystals, in case you're wondering."

* * *

LATER THAT DAY:

"Brad."

"Hank."

Brad looked up at his cohort.

"So, what's the test say?"

"He's a match. Congratulations, Turner. You're the father of Lance Alvers. Or as you know him, Avalanche."

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Yes, the Eric that Emma Frost was addressing was the one you're thinking of. To quote Carol Ann from _Poltergeist II_ , he's ba-ack! And yes, I did say earlier in this fic that Earth-H Aja wasn't a speedster. I never said that she'd _stay_ that way.


End file.
